Q: What happened to the man who didn't know the difference between putty and toothpaste?
A: All his windows fell out.
Q:What did the martian say to the petrol pump?
A: Take your finger out of your ear when I'm talking to you.
Q:Why do birds fly south in the winter?
A: Because hey can't afford to take the train.
Q: How do you make a band stand?
A: Hide all the chairs.
Q: What is gray has four legs and a trunk?
A: A mouse going on holiday.
Q: What is green and bounces around the garden?
A: A spring onion.
